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NOT A PERFECT MOM

My adult sons really make me look good.  They turned out pretty well.  I take little credit because I was not a perfect mom.  None of us is perfect.  Yet, motherhood taught me my need to pray.  I could not handle it on my own.  I needed Jesus.  He filled in the gaps where I failed.

I loved being a mom.  In fact, I loved being pregnant.  Maybe it was that longing fulfilled, but knowing God had entrusted another life to me to nourish made me float on air.   I was a mom!   I was euphoric.

Being an idealist, I wanted everything to be perfect.  But my children upset that mindset.  They fought going to bed at night.  They cried in the church nursery.  They pouted when they didn’t get their own way.  They embarrassed me in restaurants.  They made me repeat instructions over and over again. They didn’t always obey.  Thy whined.  They manipulated.  They rolled their eyes at me and made faces behind my back.  And on a couple of occasions, they even lied.  Yep, I admit it!  They were little sinners.

At times, their behavior gave me visions of hopelessness.  What would they become?  Would they turn their backs on God?  Where would they end up?  Behind bars?

While I realize now it really wasn’t that bad, there were times I was desperate.  I felt like a failure as a parent and often didn’t know how to respond to their misbehavior or bad attitudes.  Sometimes it was easier to look the other way.  Other times I seemed to have the needed wisdom and energy for discipline. But consistency wasn’t easy.  We don’t major in parenting or get a degree in being a supermom.  That’s when I learned to really pray.

It’s where I found myself on many occasions.  I remember flinging myself across the bed in tears because of my fears for their future.  Where did I go wrong?  What could I do to ensure their right decisions?  There was only One who could help me.  His Name was Jesus.

He led me to a “Moms in Touch” group where I began praying with other moms.  Every week for an hour we lifted our concerns to the Lord.  We took no time for requests.  We prayed them.  I learned to pray that my children wouldn’t get away with things.  That they would even get caught if they strayed.  That wrong attitudes and misbehaviors would be nipped in the bud before it was too late.

It helped to know we weren’t alone in our concerns.  We felt supported in our motherhood role.  As we prayed for each other’s children, they became like our own. From help with tests, teachers, extracurricular activities, college and even future spouses, we agreed together for God to work His will in their lives.  We prayed them from elementary school right through to college and marriage.  We witnessed miracles of answered prayers through the years. And we always took time to thank God for every one of them.

Several years have passed since my “Moms in Touch” days, but God continues to work through those prayers.  I just returned from a mission trip with a team of 22 from CityCommunity Church.  Two of the moms I used to pray with had sons on this team.  I was overwhelmed watching them flourish in their gifts as they displayed Jesus Christ to the children of Honduras. Did their mother’s prayers make a difference in their lives?  You bet they did!

Are you tired of getting little improvement in your efforts to discipline?  Are you scared about your child’s future?  Are you feeling like a failure as a parent because of your children’s disobedience?  I found the secret.  You can’t do it alone.  You need Jesus.  You might even need some other moms.  The answer to all of your concerns comes through prayer.  Tell Jesus all about it.  Ask Him to help you.  And some day your adult children might make you look good, too!

8 thoughts on “NOT A PERFECT MOM

  1. Loved this entry. Your Godly wisdom is encouraging to those of us with young ones.
    Love and miss you all.
    ~Stacey

  2. I sent this to my MIT moms. Your words are so encouraging to us! Seeing Ryan in this pick reminds me how blessed I am to have you and Kim in my life from when my own boys were little . Your families and lives have always been encouragement to me! You ladies are the real deal! I love you both!

  3. Thank you…
    Over the weekend I found out some heart-wrenching news and I immediately felt the need to cry, burrow into a whole… whatever I could do to make the trouble I’m finding my child in go away. My husband said that he has to let his faith in God be his guidance. So while I’m struggling to find my footing and figuring out where I went wrong with my daughter, he’s doing what he should. Giving it to God, and trusting Him to give him the wisdon needed to help direct and discipline our daughter. It’s not always easy to give up our burdens, especially when it comes to our children. I know I must, it certainly beats crying into my pillow endlessly. This blog is exactly what I needed. I know that I’m not the first mom to go through trials with thier child, who’s just beginning to discover themselves, I know I certainly will not be the last. I will be checking with my church to see if this same thing is offerred and if not, maybe I should speak with other mothers and get a prayer time started for our youngsters…

  4. Thank you for sharing this Karen. I can attest from the grown up child’s perspective that a praying Mom makes a world of difference. I always thought my Mom was short, what I’ve realized is, she’s a giant that spent my childhood on her knees (praying for me and my siblings). Thought you should know there was another “grown up boy” on the Honduras trip that displayed Christ to those beautiful children because of the unrelenting prayers of his Mom.

    1. Loved hearing your story about your Mom’s prayers, Steve, and the difference it made in your life. There’s nothing more powerful than a mother’s (or grandmother’s) prayers for her children! You are living proof!

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